1. Find someone with some basic experience working in a vet clinic that will perform a humane, cosmetic surgery / skin graft on an infant angora/pygmy goat for me, uniting the immature horn buds in the center of the forehead so that it eventually grows a single horn in the center of its forehead. And I will name it "Gingerbread".
2. Create a cement statue of myself, lying down as if asleep, to be placed on top of my stone/concrete coffin when I die, like they do in all the LOTR/medieval/fantasy-type movies. (Hey it makes sense, why would I wanna do something like that when I'm 60? I'll take my nearly-30-yr-old concrete self over a version where my body has already gone to pot any day.)
3. Remodel my house to look like a small castle, complete with a dungeon/ crypt (hey, I already mentioned the furniture for that room) for a basement, at least one tower, crenelations or "battlements" like a fortress along the top, a streetlamp out front as a tribute to Narnia, a stone fence, a sliding bookshelf to reveal a secret passage, a portcullis, gothic windows, a fairy garden in the back yard, etc...
I guess that's the worst of it.
... Did I mention my husband and my 3yr old daughter might be going to jousting/knight camp next month?
Yes, we're eccentric. At the very least.
Sometimes it makes me nervous about meeting new people, because I'm afraid they'll brush me off, and sometimes when my husband mentions something weird about us that might raise eyebrows (he's pretty straight-forward about it), I deflect it, making it sound like we were humorously using an odd word to describe something actually normal, and Oliver just thinks I misunderstood what he was actually referring to, (which gives him time to re-think telling someone we just met what my burial plans are).
At least he's on board with all my crazy stuff. So is my daughter. And my son is only 1, but I can tell that if he's not into it, he'll be at least very tolerant of us. (He's a pretty patient, thoughtful little thing, and he's always happy spending time with us, rarely wandering off to do his own thing).
Yay! We're a unit! ;)